Safewords and Abusive Relationships

Safeword, I don’t believe in using it, and that makes it look like I am not into believing SSC or RACK. But actually that is not the fact. I do belive in consent if nothing else. The consent of the partner who is involved with me, with his/her desires, and the trust that those desires will be fulfilled at one or other level.

Although i at times belive in pure d/s, one of my subs, Silver had said it to me once, that i am more into equality than a pure d/s. If i have to explain the equality, it means that he has got equal chances of consideration when he speaks up his doubts and opnions. And this equality, if does not exist in a relation, turns the relation into an abusive one. And Even though i am not into safewords, I’m totally against domestic violense and abuse within a relationship.

The safeword in a d/s play is to prevent it from turning into a abusive kind, and if the purpose is served where me and my sub has formed an intense bonding where the safeword is no longer a necessity, then the safeword better not be there to ruin the purity of the d/s.

To me, being in a pure d/s means, where the essence of relationship is known. To me, and to other partner. The consent is given, frmo both the sides. That he wants to submit to me, and i want to dominate him, as and when time/whim allows/requires. That he knows his boundries are going to be stretched and pushed. And we have reached a level whereas he can trust me with the safety of his mind and body.

In a pure d/s, i am no more into sessions, the d/s doesn’t just remain in a session, where once done with it, the submissive can think of packing his bags and say, “it was great babe! let’s do it some otehr time!” It’s rather the other way round. its the end of the session that brings us more together. The bonds form after the extreme play, and the aftermath is mostly a pulse, a surge of strong emotions. Of belonging.. together.

A surrender then begins, after the session.

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